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Change. A fact of life, yet all of us hate it. Some handle it better than others. Woody, in Disney’s Toy Story gives us a perfect example of how us as a people handle change. Woody is moving to a new house and threatened by a new toy. Woody goes through a hard time and does not handle change well at all. He becomes easily jealous and causes a lot of problems. It is not until the end of the movie when Woody realizes Buzz is not as bad as he thought that he accepts the change and things improve.
Change is not easy to handle; we are creatures of habit. We like things to
be the same, but the way of life is all about change. There are ways of making
things seem better though and ways to change our negative outlook on change.
1) Be prepared for change. Most changes we can see coming. Prepare
yourself ahead of time and tell yourself that this change is inevitable and
happening. The more you talk to yourself positively about change, the easier it can
be.
2) Find appropriate support. Woody’s advice to his fellow toys going
through a move and a large change was “find a moving buddy.” Are you alone in
this change? Probably not. Most likely you are going through this change with
someone else. Utilize them. If you are alone, find someone to talk to about it with. Supports
are always available, you just have to ask.
3) Express feelings about change. As I mentioned in the previous point,
open up to someone about it. If you cannot open up to someone else, then open
up to yourself in some form like journaling. Express things, do not hold them
in. Expressing it gets it out and lets us move on instead of holding it inward and dwelling.
4) Be aware of unrealistic expectations. Often times we build things up
in our minds. We have certain expectations for these changes and when they do
not happen, we get disappointed. Be aware of what your expectations are.
Expectations and reality are often different unfortunately.
5) What is the worst that can happen? Along with unrealistic
expectations, maybe look at what is the worst that can happen. Normally, the
worst does not actually happen. By thinking it in these terms we can all be
happily surprised to find that maybe change was not all that bad to begin with.
6) Acknowledge you can only control yourself. As much as everyone loves
to be in control, that is not always entirely possible. Learn you cannot
control the actions of others or some aspects of change, but you can control
yourself and how you handle and think of change.
7) Use your coping skills. Use those skills, tools, distractions, etc.
that help you deal with other problems. That is what they are there for. If you
do not have any, write a long list of possible tools to use such as journaling,
taking a bath, exercising, etc.
8) Take things slowly. Set goals for yourself and pace yourself in your
change. Things can always be broken down so they are easier to handle.
Know that you are not alone in thinking change is hard. Everyone has difficulty accepting change and making it happen. Just make it a little easier on yourself by following those simple steps.
